Rewrite your stories with my edits, and post them here. Be sure to read other stories, as there was some excellent writing for this assignment!
The assignment was to write a story about a memorable event from your childhood as if you were still a child (just like Bruno in "The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas"). The purpose is for you to understand the link between perspective and tone in literature, as well as to practice your awesome writing skills.
Rewrite your stories with my edits, and post them here. Be sure to read other stories, as there was some excellent writing for this assignment!
7 Comments
Pinky
12/1/2014 06:41:57 pm
Child Hood Memory
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Calvin 9.2
12/3/2014 11:46:17 pm
Before that day, I thought fire was fun. Honestly, a week before it happened, I wished I could see a fire break-out. I played with candles during black outs. Once, I even set a box of tissues on fire while I was playing "swing" with the candles. Every time, when my neighbor told my dad about cables malfunctioning and smoke hissing through the meter box, I wished it was more intense than that.
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Anthony 9.2
12/5/2014 01:19:55 pm
Let me introduce myself. My name is Anthony and I am 9 years old. I have a little sister named Rosemary. Today we went to school with my sister. Then, it was 3 o’clock, so school was dismissed. I was waiting for my mom to come pick me up. “Why is my mom taking so long to pick me up? “I thought. Then I waited for about 5 minutes, and then my mom arrived to school. I stepped inside the car with my sister. My mom said, “It was traffic that took me so long to come to school.” I thought about what traffic meant. Then we finally reached home. I was sleeping but my mom woke me up. I stretched my arms. My sister stepped out of the car and I also followed her. But suddenly my sister shut the car door and I did not really notice it. The car door squashed my head. So the car door made my head very painful. I shouted, “AHHHHHH hurts!!!” Then I rushed into my house. I heard my mom Giggle, and then I wondered why my mom giggled. But luckily I notice that my head wasn’t seriously injured. My mom and my sister quickly rushed to me. They said,” Are you OK!” I Whined “I feel very dizzy and a lot of pain!” My sister said sorry to me, but when I thought about what had just happened, I really felt angry about that. I thought my head was squashed because of one reason. That reason was my car was a Mitsubishi Pajero Mini, which only had two doors to Exit the car. When we used that car, every passenger that sits behind needs to exit from one door. My sister probably forgot that I was also stepping out, because she was very sleepy. I tried to think about why my mom giggled. But I was not really sure. My dad arrived home at night time. So my mom told him about the story. My dad also giggled when he heard it from my mom. I thought, when I grow up, I will still remember about my childhood memory.
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Sharon 9.2
12/5/2014 05:59:42 pm
My Cousin’s Sleepover
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Suwadi
12/6/2014 08:26:56 pm
Last month, something really terrible happened. I couldn’t believe that it actually happened. It was an accident. I only remembered some parts because I was so shocked. I was at my very very cool aunt’s house. We were having a pretty nice lunch when that accident happened.
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Kyaw Zin Hein
12/7/2014 10:47:06 pm
I was 8 years old. It was early in the morning when I heard a bang on the door. The maid shouted at me to wake up. I didn't know why she was shouting at me to wake up. I heard sirens outside my house. I couldn't figure out what was happening until I heard, "Fire!" So, I quickly got up and put my glasses on. I took my phone and got up. Maids were trying to take the valuable things from my house to get them to safety. So, I wondered what I should do. I was thinking what to do as I was not fully awake. One of the maids carried me into the living room. I shouted, "What are we going to do?" And you said, "Just run and be safe." So, I had to run but I waited for you. We should go together. My dad was not here so, there were you, me and three maids. So, I just waited in the living room. I was also very scared and didn't know what to do. Unluckily, our house on the highest floor of the apartment. You were taking the money and valuable things. The smoke was about to fill up our house. So, you said to run down. I ran down the stairs to be safe. I was worried that you would be left behind. So, I was always looking back. Every time I looked, you were there. Finally, we went down to the ground floor. There were a lot of people and fire trucks on the street. I looked at what was really happening when we arrived on the ground. The bakery beside our side was on fire. The fire fighters were there and trying to stop the fire. Another fire truck came to put out the fire. We went to the coffee shop infront of our house. It was lucky that we all were safe. So, i went out to see what was happening. I went with my maid to see what was happening. Fire fighters had put out the fire a little. 2 of the fire fighters went into the shop to find why there was a fire. Finally, they could put out the fire. The crowds cheered at the fire fighters, who tried hard to put out the fire. It was very scary. After that, the reporters arrived and interviewed the fire fighters. After everything finished, I went back to the coffee shop and slept there for a while. When I woke up, we went back to our house, and it was lucky that nothing happened to our house. But my mom sent me to grand father's house.
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Su Thinzar
12/13/2014 11:47:36 pm
I was very excited. I was jumping up and down so rapidly that i was annoying some people, specifically my cousin brother. It was 7 pm. The night market was crowded and everything was dense. There was a big, medium, small ferris wheel that was spun by humans. I mean think about it! What if we fell from the top of that ferris wheel? It made me shiver and gave me goosebumps. I was never the kind of kid who would take adventures.
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