This is an example of a submission. :)
Once upon a time, in the extravagant, amazing city of Manhattan, New York, Jeremy Flicker was trying to create an experiment to make things invisible; he is a very intelligent kid, and for his birthday he wanted a pack of experimental chemicals to make theories. That day, his cat Mishu was in his room while Jeremy works. The formula was not quite finished. He just needed 2ml of h2o in the formula, but he stumbled with his cat and pushed the table causing all chemicals fall in the formula and the formula on Mishu. In just 10 seconds, little kitten Mishu has been converted in a 67ft tall cat! Jeremy was amazed, he was as shock as a when someone sees a car accident. Suddenly, both Mishu and Jeremy smelled cheese and looked down to see a rat running with a slice of cheese it founded, going to the little house he has under Jeremy’s window.
…Mishu went behind the rat…
Apparently, Mishu is tall and also strong, and the window had a beautiful look of New York. Guess who broke the window and the wall? Mishu. In less than 5 seconds, you could hear a lot of people screaming! The thunder of sounds was bigger than in a concert at Madison Square Garden! Jeremy was terribly afraid. You could hear the car horns, the helicopter blades and the sound of buildings falling because Mishu was playing with them.
Then, Jeremy had a great idea. As he looked at the terrible view, of people hiding and running, Mishu playing with the upper part of the Empire State, the sound of different transports, the awful smell of fire, and the nasty taste of smoke, he thought that if he gets more chemicals, he would create the perfect antidote to make Mishu smaller! He noticed in the sky, an airship with a screen showing the news saying that in the city of Manhattan in New York, there was a PARANORMAL CATIVITY going on!! Then news about the Yankees game that was going to be in 3 hours, and Jeremy suddenly woke up and approach him into a toy store. That’s right, the store was also in panic, but Jeremy didn’t stop. His scientific gift was from Toys-R-Us, and he did a quick math problem solving for him to create the antidote. When he tripped with Mishu, the h2o (a.k.a water) felled in each one of the chemicals and then on the formula, and the opposite of water is vinegar, “at least that’s what people say,” Jeremy thought, and with his savings, bought the game as fast he could because the cashier was also desperate. He went to a public bathroom near the store, he saw Mishu in the Rockefeller Tower playing with the building, time is running, in just minutes, Mishu unnoticed, will have destroyed Manhattan! Jeremy found a lady with a bottle of vinegar she bought from the supermarket, he asked if he can use the bottle, “Of course, she said, “Because if it would be my last day on earth, for what in the world will I need a bottle of vinegar?” Well Jeremy knows for what, to save HER AND EVERYONE’S LIVES!! He made the old formula; the smell was as odd and horrible as a rotten banana… He put 2mg of vinegar in each chemical and pours it in the formula. He had it! All Jeremy needed was to convince Mishu to eat. When he got out of the bathroom, the smell of fire became the smell of cat poop, BIG cat poop, and he remembered that Mishu gets hungry after pooping. That means that know, HUGE CUTE KITTY MISHU has become a HUGE BAD ATTITUDE HUNGRY MISHU! If Jeremy does not act right now, in a few minutes Manhattan will be vanished! Luckily, he saw a pet store; he rapidly bought two packs of cat food, and 10 cat food plates. He went in the middle of the street; he put the food in the plates and the antidote in the food. Jeremy took away a megaphone of a national police and called, “Mishu, mishu, mishu” again and again until Mishu appeared. When the cat saw the food, he started eating, and as he ate, he got smaller, and smaller, and smaller. “Thank God!” Jeremy screamed as everyone cheered him. A day later, Jeremy appeared in the news as the kid who almost made Manhattan disappeared by accidently converting his cat into a HUGE cat, and as the one who saved the city of Manhattan by converting his own kitten back to normal. A few months later, the city was newly repaired (also, Jeremy helped fix the city by his newest invention, a robot he made with the help of the NASA and Romans Robots, that could build again buildings as how they were) Jeremy and Mishu were back to their normal routines and lives. In consequence of almost destroying the city, Jeremy got grounded and he couldn’t use his chemical “toys” for a long time, but he didn’t care. Instead, he was in his room with Mishu writing in a notebook his new ideas and future projects. Every day Jeremy remembered himself what Einstein said: “Logic will take from point A into point B, but imagination will take you anywhere.” And the only thing Jeremy does when h
First of all I really like the tittle, you used lot of creativity. The fact that the cat reached 67ft tall, what a precise number!
Great title and I really liked the descriptions.
Lost, alone and trapped. These words are what my head repeated over and over again. Apart from being lost in an evergreen forest, ten thousand players and I were trapped in Sword Art Online. The game is pretty amazing, but the problem is that when your HP (hit points) reach zero you die in the videogame and in real life. If another person removes your Nerve Gear (a device that allows you to enter a virtual reality game), the device emits microwaves that make your brain explode. The only way of getting out alive is if you reach the 100th floor and defeat the boss.
Anyways it was my own choice to come here. I really want to help the front lines advance to the final floor. The only way I can do that is by leveling up and there is no better place to go up levels than the harshest environment in Sword Art Online, floor 47’s evergreen forest.
While I walked through the blizzard I spotted an injured wolf. At first I hesitated to help it, but he was in need so I helped him. Once the wolf woke up he rapidly stood up and growled at me. Soon he lost balance and fell. For a while the wolf was calm until both of us felt a presence nearby. Suddenly nine wolves surrounded us, so I prepared my sword in case we were going to battle. The wounded wolf stood in front of me as if he was going to protect me. From out of nowhere the leader of the wolf pack dug it’s fangs into the injury of the lost wolf. The only thing I could do was fight to protect weak wolf, so I defeated the entire wolf pack. Right after the battle I used my last healing crystal on the hurt wolf. His HP went back to maximum. Even though he was completely restored the wolf followed.
A week went by and the wolf was still by my side. I decided I should name him, so I named Tadase. I did not only make a friend I had almost reached level 50, I was two levels away. We continued to explore the forest, I had one problem I did not know how to get out of the forest and I was out of teleport crystals. Nevertheless I continued to level up with help of Tadase.
One night we went inside a cave for shelter because of the snow storm. Then a shadow lurked out from deep inside the cave. Both Tadase and I were terrified. We could finally see what this was… a giant grizzly bear. I quickly realized that this was no normal bear it was a dungeon boss. Tadase and I fought hard, but soon after giving it our all both of our health bars went from green to yellow.
I was scared. Even though we did everything we could the bear beat us. At least we didn’t die, but our HP was red, almost at zero. After a couple of seconds I saw nothing but pitch black, I fainted. I don’t know how much time passed, but when I woke up it was different. I could no longer see snow, I did not feel the cold breeze and the sound of wolves howling was no longer there.
I was in a house. I didn’t know where, but I did know it was not the forest. Then two people came through the door, I couldn’t believe what I saw. The players who walked in where none other than Sword Art Online’s very best: The Lightning Flash, Asuna and The Black Swordsman, Kirito.
I asked them what had happened. Asuna responded, “We were traveling through the forest in floor 47 when we saw you and the wolf were fainted so we took you in.” Then I questioned where the wolf was. Kirito answered, “He never left your side during the trip, and right now he is resting outside, waiting for you.” I rushed outside to see Tadase, I was so glad that he was safe.
After going back inside Asuna and Kirito asked me how I got to the forest, I responded: “I went there because I wanted to. Since the very beginning I wanted to help the front lines, so I chose to level up in that forest.” Kirito questioned, “Didn’t you take any crystals with you?” I replied, “Yes, a healing crystal; but I used it to heal Tadase after another wolf bit him in Tadase’s injured paw.” “Would you like to join us in the front lines?” Asuna requested. I was so excited that my desire to help the top players defeat the game that I hugged her, she knew what I meant by this. Then Kirito mentioned that after all I defeated a bear and an entire wolf pack.
When all of the excitement was over I noticed that my level was not 48 nor 50, it was higher. I was at level 72, I didn’t know how, but it was amazing.
A couple of months passed and both Tadase and I were considered top players. I was right behind Asuna and Kirito, it was my dream come true. None of this would have happened if I didn’t get lost in the forest and found Tadase. In the end all four of us worked really hard to defeat the final boss and we did. At last I got home, I didn’t think I would see Tadase again, but guess who was next to me when I woke up in the real world? Yes, it was him I did not know how but someway Tadase became reality.
I really like this story, the creativity and the connection you did. I really loved the fact that you put your personal interests like video games, into your story. I loved the introduction and the body, but the ending was a little bit weaker, as if you had squeezed two whole paragraphs into two sentences, without details. But over all it was really good.
I really enjoyed this story! I never thought of writing a story were I was in a videogame, great creativity there.
Sometime in history there were no cats on Earth, and sometime in history there was a war, between cats and humans, quite normal huh?
This war was like any other one: with fights, deaths, weapons, blood… but there was quite an important difference: in this war, one side only wanted to play. The other side wanted to play in a completely different way: Extinction of race.
It was called The Furryous War. Few people know about it. Dare to join the club?
Sometime in history,humans did not have cats, but cats had their own planet and it got pretty lonely.
Cat planet looked; like a cat. It was round just like our planet but instead of looking like a blue and green sphere, it looked like a cat face sphere. It was as if a cat’s face was trapped in a snow globe. The eyes of this cat where green like a meadow and his pupils where not black, instead they looked as if a galaxy was trapped inside of them, a spiral of stars merging together to form a giant ball of light. It’s fur was grey like the clouds on a rainy day, with a pint of white that seemed to send you to a field full of white, puffy snow. The cat’s snout was as black as the night sky, its also had the stars that the night sky has.
Around the “cat faced snow ball” was a ring with the colors of the rainbow, red, orange, yellow, green, blue , and purple. The planet was a true beauty.
But to every good thing, there must be a dark side. The dark side of this planet was the smell. The moment you set foot on the crust, it was as if a bomb hit you right on the face: a stinky bomb. The smell of rotten fish mixed with cat fesses, it was as if the planet was a giant litter box.
And the noise. The noise in that place was unbearable. There were meows all over the place, but that was not the annoying thing about it, it was the yawing and complains heard the 74 hours of the cat-day. All day, every day the cats complained about the stink and the boredom and the trash and the same routine every single day.
And that’s when the idea came, some of the cats suggested that they head on to one of the pupils of the cat-face that their planet has. Because these were actually portals to other galaxies.
And so its starts: the cats hop in, and off to Earth they go.
In the blink of an eye the cats were standing in a strange place. A landscape they had never seen before. There were little houses and tall houses, grey buildings and white buildings, some of them were taller than the cats, but others were less than 30 feet.
They had already planned their tactic, so they walked around the city, and did not get the impression they were waiting for, they wanted to find their own humans, who take care of them and clean up all of their fesses, but they most defiantly did not.
Humans got scared: they brought out their weapons, their soldiers and everything they could find and threw them at the poor cats, lucky thing they had 6 lives (because they come from another galaxy).
Then, after 3 months of fighting and no harming, a scientist on New York came up with an idea, to shrink the cats!! But first he had to do his research.
Humans had never seen cats before, they did not know how they acted, what they ate, how they had fun… So the Scientist took quite a long time figuring out how to shrink the cats.
One day, a couple of months later, the New Yorker finally got it, fish! That was the answer, since cats ate fish he would inject some of his potion onto some fish and set them out on the street for the cats to eat and enjoy.
The Scientist but his plan to work. The cats were attracted to the smell of fish and came rushing into it, suddenly all the huge cats began to get smaller and smaller by the second, until they were finally the perfect size, some were bigger than others or had sharper teeth. Some had stripes while others had spots. Some of them stayed in the city, others fled out to the jungle or the forests.
Everybody was asking the same question: Who did all this? Who solved their problem?
The scientist new people were asking, but he also knew that people would bother him if they found out that he did it, that he was the one who saved them, so he just kept it to himself.
He kept the secret of a new race on the planet: felines.
The title of this story is "The Furryous War"
I really like this story! Great descriptive writing, great creativity, in conclusion amazing story.
Great! Great! Check for comma splices! ;)
The Call of the Wild
With nervousness crawling into me I said my last goodbyes to my mom. I was having a trip with my cousin to the northeast peak of Russia. We were going to ski for my birthday and we were going to stay on my aunt’s house.
When the plane departed I had already checked my bag for the 57th time since I made it.
“Flashlights, scissors-“ I checked.
“Are you really going to need that?” my cousin interrupted my checking.
“It´s just in case something happens,” I remind her.
“Paula, you are overthinking everything, good thing we are traveling on a prop plane, if not you wouldn´t be able to carry all your stuff,” she calmed me.
“Why is that a good thing?” I questioned.
“Because, if you wouldn’t have brought those things you would have delivered all your nervousness onto me, asking questions and making my head explode,” she explained.
“Okay,” I sighed.
But, what we didn’t know was what was later expecting us.
Two hours have passed when the pilot tells us that we will need to do an emergency stop on the Shkhara mountains, located on the west of Asia because we were running low on fuel.
I didn’t took notice of my horrified face until my cousin told me:
“Paula, don’t worry. We are just going to stop for a moment, refill the tank and depart,” she explained.
“We are getting close to the mountains,” the pilot told us.
The comment from the pilot wasn’t the only thing alerted us we were arriving. The white, silky sheet of never ending snow and the sound of wind howling from the other side of the plane´s glass pane, had already showed it. The slight cold breeze was getting inside of the plane.
“It must be really cold outside!” exclaimed my cousin.
“Yeah,” I laughed nervously, trying to relieve the tension.
Once we landed I quickly searched for my bag and changed to a more suitable outfit due to the climate.
“Uh-oh,” I heard the pilot say.
“What happened?” I asked nervously.
“I forgot to bring extra fuel, we are trapped here for a couple of days,” answered the pilot.
My heart skipped a beat, my stomach felt heavy.
“I think I’m about to throw up,” I warned.
The pilot quickly calls by the transmitter to ask for some fuel.
“Okay, but it might take a minimum of three days. Is that okay?” I heard the woman in the radio ask.
“As long as you bring the fuel, it will be alright,” the pilot turns around just to see my horrified expression.
As the pilot finishes talking he approaches us.
“As you might have heard, we are going to be stranded for a couple of days,” the pilot informed us, “we will need to look for something to eat.”
“I can look for some…berries?” my cousin asked.
“Berries, in the snow…really? You will find more easily some bark,” the pilot informed my cousin, “but don’t go too far, I don’t want to lose any of you.”
“You…” the pilot said thoughtfully while looking at me, “you will stay here starting a fire and preparing a camp, while I go hunt for some food.”
After we exchanged ‘see you laters’ I started looking for some branches. When I found the branches I ran to them and took them as fast as possible. As I did that I heard a dog wince. When I turned my head in the direction of the sound I found a wolf that had being injured, maybe by a fight. He looked terrible, the white fur in his throat look as if it was tainted with blood. He was also struggling to breath. I didn’t know if I should approach him or leave him there. My mind rushed with ideas, but I decided to help him. I took him to the prop plane and rested him on the leather chair. I took matches from my bag and quickly lit up a fire. I took water and poured it into his cut. The water had made my view clearer, he was in a fight and was injured badly.
“What are you doing?” the voice of my cousin startles me.
“I was looking for some wood and I found him,” I explained.
“I’m back!” the pilot interrupted us, “I brought a couple of chipmunks and WHAT IS THAT DOING ON MY PLANE?!” the pilot pointed towards the wolf.
“I found him injured and I brought him here to help him,“ I explained for the second time.
“Okay, let’s just make dinner and go back to sleep, tomorrow is going to be a new day,” the pilot said as he used one of my branches to cook the chipmunk.
When we were done eating I made sure the wolf had eaten his dinner and cleaned him once more, thi
this time cutting some hair he had on the throat so that the cut could breathe and heal faster.
The pilot was fast asleep on the leather chairs and my cousin, the wolf, and I were making some space at the back of the plane.
“Good thing I brought all these unnecessary things, uh?” I mocked my cousin.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever…now pass me the pillow and blanket,” she said.
And we were all fast asleep.
The roaring sound of the strong blizzard of snow outside of the plane woke me up.
When my blurry vision started to clear I notice that the blizzard already woke up everyone else.
“I don’t think we will be able to exit the plane until the blizzard ends,” the pilot informs us while looking out from the window.
“How are we going to look for food then?” my cousin questioned.
“The bark leftovers from yesterday will do enough for breakfast and lunch if we administrate it correctly,” the pilot told us.
“Were is it, my stomach is growling,” my cousin complained.
“The only thing you think about is food,” I told her.
“Sorry, it’s survival,” she defends herself.
Before any of us can say another thing the pilot gave each one of us two big pieces of bark. The bark had a rough texture, if you didn’t eat it delicately it could cause a rash in your mouth. It tasted like cardboard. I didn’t like the taste, but if that is the only thing we have I’ll eat it.
After 27 minutes of closely inspecting the blizzard I ended up comparing the snow to fluff, when…
“Oh! I almost forgot, I brought some games to play” I announced.
“Really!? Which ones?” my cousin exclaimed, more enthusiastic than me.
“Cards, chess…and also Monopoly…I think,” I tried to remember some more when my cousin had already made up her mind.
“Monopoly, let´s play Monopoly, that’s my favorite game!” she exclaimed.
“You in?” I asked the pilot.
“Sure, why not?” he answered me.
After I bought the majority of the terrains and houses on the board, bankrupted my cousin, and three hours of a very tiring game, the pilot and I surrendered and my cousin won.
The blizzard had already ceased and the pilot was preparing to leave to find more chipmunks to eat. My cousin and I quickly went to grab some wood for today and tomorrow. We ran back to the plane and quickly started a fire.
The wolf was still lying on the same spot he slept. He was very weak, we knew he might not live much longer, but we also knew we needed to make his last days the best days ever.
“How are we going to name him?” my cousin interrupted my thinking.
“I don’t know…maybe Freddie?” I suggested.
“Perfect, I love it!” she answered.
I went on to clean Freddie’s cut one more time. We started to play some card games while waiting for the pilot to come back. When we finished our fifth game of cards, the pilot finally arrived.
We played one last game while the pilot made the food.
I was starting to like the taste of chipmunk. It had a sweet taste and a juicy texture, even though my cousin said it was the total opposite. When we were done eating we all took a short nap.
When I woke up everyone else was still sleeping so I decided to take a short walk around the plane. After two long minutes of walking I finally started seeing some vegetation, grass. I ran a bit more until I reached a village. I told the villagers about our situation and they didn’t hesitate on helping us.
Before I could even notice I was talking on the phone with the rescuers so they could come and help us. The pilot and the villagers where bringing our bags from the plane to the village, including Freddie.
The voice of a woman startles me, “Max?” the woman said looking towards Freddie, “where have you been, we have we have all been looking for you. You know how worried all of us where?” the woman said.
“Max?” my cousin and I said in a unison.
“Yes he was the caretaker of our kids. But, two weeks ago he escaped, but now he is here and that’s what matters,” said the woman.
After hours of talking, sharing and celebrating the rescuing helicopters came to view. The pilot, my cousin and I where all so excited and so proud of ou
ourselves for have survived almost two days at the mountains.
On the ride to our aunt’s house I was just thinking on how to explain all of this to her. But, once we arrive the only thing she do is hug us tight.
The table is served with the specialty of my aunt, crepes, and we hurry to eat them. While eating, my aunt approaches us and asks:
“So, how did you end up lost in the mountains and how did you manage to survive?”
“Heh, long story,” my cousin answered for both of us.
Call of the wild
I am Jose Ricardo Aponte and this is my story how I survived. One day I had a flight from Dominican Republic to New York I was transporting goods to the U.S. I was on a AN 225 MRIYA a cargo plane. Before takeoff the engines roared like a lion, then I moved the aircraft to the designated runway my co pilot matt was the one helping me throughout the flight. We took off, there was a lot of snow it was really blurry everything was white you heard a loud wind howl. I went to the bathroom for a moment, I left matt in charge of the cockpit suddenly we felt a really strong turbulence the plane moved up and and down so I runned to the cockpit and I saw matt laying down on the floor he fainted. when I tried to steer the plane the ailerons frozed the plane was going down. I was really nervous my heart was beating rapidly I passed out.
When I woke up I was freezing so I turned my head and I saw the co pilots body he was dead I decided to take his cloth out and put it on because i will die of hypothermia the cockpit was white was full of snow it was white I only had a a broken pencil and a broken piece of paper so I stood up and I was looking for shelter so I find a cave I entered carefully inside because it could have a bear inside it was empty I will pass the night there you heard wolfs howling it was terrifying so I used to rocks and the piece of paper to make fire at the other days I heard snowmobiles nearby so I runned and I thought I made it I stood up in the middle of the snowmobile trails and fainted they saved me they took me to the hospital and this is how I am here today.
"The Call from a Wild Neighborhood"
I was very excited to visit my grandparents in New York. As I was in the plane, all I could think about was how much fun I would have there playing with the snow. This would be the first Christmas I would spend there. The plane was crowed and loud, but I didn’t care, as I was too excited.
As soon as I left the aircraft, my excitement grew larger; I was finally going to see my grandparents. When I walked outside of the airport gates, there she was. My beloved grandmother standing there, looking straight at me, smiling. I couldn’t hold it any longer, and I ran to her arms. At that precise moment, I noticed that my grandfather was not there. I asked where he was and my grandmother, with very sad eyes told me that he was in the hospital since the day before, but I could not visit him because he was in the Intensive Care unit.
That night, while tucked warmly in bed, I thought about my dear grandfather. I wanted to see him so badly that I made a plan to sneak out and go to that hospital as soon as my grandmother fell asleep.
I didn’t think about any of the dangers that people face in the wild streets of New York City. I never thought I wouldn’t make it to the hospital. I didn’t anticipate that I would get lost, as I was a girl from a small town who had been to New York very few times.
I packed a small bag with a snack and drink for later, put on warm clothes and headed, as I thought, to the hospital to see my grandfather.
Apparently I made a wrong turn somewhere and ended up in a very bad neighborhood. I felt so scared, as I had never felt before. I walked and walked and just couldn’t find my way home. As the night grew darker, I began to feel hungry. I unpacked my snack and as soon as I was about to put it in my mouth, out of nowhere, a very scary and mean looking kid took it from my hands. I started to cry, because I was hungry, scared and cold.
I saw a Chinese Restaurant that was open at that time. I went in to feel warm, but the mean kid followed me there and made me give him my jacket and shoes. The Chinese Restaurant owner just looked the other way. Apparently this kid meant trouble.
As soon as the kid left with my jacket and shoes, the owner of the restaurant told me that I had to leave. At this point I was shaking; I don’t know if it was the cold freezing weather or how scared a felt. Thank God I still had my drink in my bag. I drank it all without stopping to breathe. I was very thirsty and hungry.
I left the restaurant and begged everyone that walked passed me for help, but no one even said a word to me. I was so desperate that since earlier I had seen a kid go into a sewer, so I decided to do the same thing. It was so dark that my eyes took a while to adapt, but it was warm. The smell hit me like a rock, it was the worst odor I had ever smelled. And that is when I saw the rats; big rats. I wished I had my snack; I wished I was in my warm bed with my grandmother; I wished my grandfather had been just fine and at the airport waiting for me.
When I was about to start crying again, I heard someone say “wake up, wake up, we’ve just landed in New York and have to leave the plane.” At first I was confused, but then I finally realized that it was all a bad dream. I jumped up from my seat and ran outside the aircraft. When I finally crossed the revolving doors out of the airport, I saw them standing there, together, looking at me and smiling. At that moment I realized that I was the happiest girl in the world.
Sorry the title is "A Call from the Wild Neighborhood"
Amazing story! I liked the idea about a wild neighborhood.
"Alone in my Mind"
I was there, sitting in the woods, lost. I thought I was in school during Math class, 9:55 am. But no, I was in a snowy, cold and frigid forest! Sorrounded by the smell of pines and white snow, I saw a colorful mountain in the distance. Curiousness overwhelmed me so I went and look what it was. A pile of books. I checked my sorroundings and there was no one but the presence of snow and trees. I searched for one book: The Wizard of Oz.
Passing and passing the pages, the cold weather was distracting me and the snow filled up my pages. “Kiera!” I heard my mom in a desperate voice. I searched for her but nothing was in my sorroundings; only snow and trees. Anyways, I kept on reading. I was so focused, I never noticed the moment snow and trees turned into chocolate, ice cream, candy canes, cookies…
I´m I crazy? Was I on a dream? No. I pinched myself and it hurted, so it wasn´t a dream. “Kiera, I love you so much!” I heard my big brother, Alec, this time. I didn´t knew what was going on. It was the second time I heard one of my family members talking to me. I felt a warm hug, but no one was there.
What would you do when being sorrounded by candy? In my situation, I had two options:
1 Think about what´s going on
2 Eat candy
I, of course, chose option number two. So I searched for my favorite candy. Hershey´s. There it was, in a shape of The Statue of Liberty from NY. While I was taking bite after bite, I felt a lot of air passing through my nostrils. A big preassure came to my right arm. I was scared and my stomach started to tell me I should stop eating chocolate.
The sky, full of cotton candy as the clouds, started to darken. I decided I would build myself a house and go to sleep. Thank God my mom, Garza, had insisted me so much on going to scouts.
“Let´s do it, I don´t care how expensive it is.” My dad´s voice woke me up. I was still alone sorrounded by candy. Why would my dad, Carlos, say such a thing? He is a wise man and I perfectly know he cares about the money that is being used.
It has passed about eight hours since I ate at last. I didn´t knew why I wasn´t hungry. I felt as if I just ate which was not my case. I personally didn´t knew what was going on. It felt as if I was on Divergent´s simulation. I was on my biggest fear. Being alone. Even though I knew that being on the simulation would be 99 percent impossible, I considered it to be one of my options. This was actually my first option.
My second option could be that I´m crazy. I think being crazy is more logic than the simulation.
I knew I had to know this place better. I started walking and everything I could think was on which candy I would take. A variety of my favorite candies sorrounded me. Sour Patch, Hershey´s, Sour Power, M&M´s, Reezes… There were candies I didn´t knew existed! One of the most exotic candies smelled like banana and tasted like a mix of mint, penut butter and caramel! That one was the most weird candy I´ve ever tasted.
After six days of being stuck in this place I was tired of the candy smell, the amount of times I heard my family members talking to me and I wanted something different to eat! I thought candies were the best thing in the world. Now I need something different like: meat, vegetables, chicken… Anyways, I went to sleep and waited for the next day, wanting to get out of here.
I woke up and I wasn´t on the candyland anymore. This place was more different. I was sorrounded by a doctor and about five nurses. My mom, dad and Alec didn´t beleive I was there; they were crying. I didn´t knew what was going on. My hands were weat. Cables sorrounded my body. A blood preassure was on my right arm. Pinches were going through my body. I heard a peep, peep, peep noise coming from the monitor.
I was so worried in that moment. What was going on? Why were my family members crying? All of a sudden, everything became black. And when I woke up, I saw my mother smiling at me.
“What´s going on, mom?”
“You were in a comma for two months, honey,” she said smiling at me.
I couldn´t believe it! Was it true? After my mother told me that, a family hug came. Now I know why nothing had sense in both the forest and candyland. I didn´t knew why it felt so real. I don´t remember where I read it, but what I read was that people that were in comma could listen what was going on in their sorroundings.
“Why were you crying?” I asked. The three of them stared at each other and finally my dad answered, “You died for five minutes.” “ But you survived thanks to the doctor!” answered my brother, Alec, in a happy voice.
My family told me the whole story and I couldn´t believe it. My dad told me that the doctors ha
OMG! I really liked this story! IT was so different with the fact of the candy... Just be careful with spelling... The fact that you were eating the Statue of Liberty (you know, made of Hershey's) remembered me of the one you told me about...
Was it normal Hershey's or Cookies & Cream Hershey's?
Jajaja - Rosa
Ok, we are near the Canadian woods. We are only 2 hours away and I’m really hungry. I’ll get some food. “Hey miss can I get some WAHHHHHHHHHHH!”
(3 Hours later)
Where am I? Where is the plane? Ok let’s look for some people or things around here. Wait I have my phone! Gahhh no service. Its ok, I’m just lost in the middle of Canada. I have a lot of clothes, some food and a cellphone with a lot of battery. Let’s turn it off for now. Let’s go to that mountain and get some signal. The airplane people should be looking for me, right? They are alive, at least I think they are. They should be, they have lots of supplies, and maybe they lost them in the crash. (In the distance) “Awooooooooo” Wait is that a wolf? I need a shelter fast. What’s this, oh right, thank god I smoke, a lighter. I’m getting cold, let’s start a shelter and a fire quick before the wolfs come. Here are some twigs, some more twigs, wow a lot of twigs are around this area. I’ll remember this place if I stay longer. I’ll need to crash on a cave. Oh there is one. And there is a bear inside not that one. Oh there is another one but it’s even bigger. Yes and there is nothing in it. I’ll start a wall here, and a door right here, and even my bed there. This is good, I’m set up for at least a night here. Though my food won’t last long. Next thing in the morning I’ll go find the plane or food.
It’s so cold, oh my god, but I can manage. Let’s go look for some people or animals for food. Yeah, let’s do that. The sun is that way, so that way is east. Let’s go north, cus that’s the way we were going. Wait is that the airplane!!!!!! Omg it is. Are there people, oh god they are all dead. But, there are all the food from the carts and stuff. And there is a can of fuel, I’ll use it for fire and this for food and ill take all the people clothes and this backpack, its full of cellphones. Let’s get back to the shelter.
(1 Hour later)
Let’s eat some breakfast, yeah some peanuts with beans, my life is going so downhill right now, omg. Let’s get to the top and search for some cell signal.
(6 hours later) Screw this I am not going up that frickin’, it’s so hard, if I had a pick that would be piece of cake, because I have a rope, but I don’t have a pick and I need stone to make one and I can get stone without one. This is so stupid. It’s starting to get dark, for now let’s just rebuild and fortify the house.
It’s already been like what 3 weeks? Why don’t people come through here? Didn’t they send a rescue party of something to save the ones that survived, like seriously? That is so stupid, they should be like (In stupid accent) “Oh that was a big crash, no one will survive that”. So stupid. Why don’t they come? I’ll set up a kind of signal, like the SOS, or like HELP. That will help yes, my food from the crash Is running out so I’ll have to go get some like berries and animals. I’ll make some weapons with the food I’ve gathered. Let’s go out. I’ll need to remember the mountain and the way I came.
(2 hours later)
Is that a bear, it’s kind of weak, I think. I’ll take it on by surprise, choke it to death with this stick. Yeah, then I’ll make a fur skin coat. I’, so close to the bear I can smell him. That bear is huge, but it has trouble standing up. This is gonna be easy as taking candy from a baby. I got you! Wait, what! No bear don’t’ I was just kidding, please don’t eat me I have a family, and friends I can’t leave hanging forever, please, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
The name is Wilderness's Calling
The name is actually The Long Dark, Sorry
Great story! I really like the fact of telling the story somehow like a journal with the date and the hour... Just that be careful, if you're going to leave suspense at the end, be sure to use more descriptive writing and a well develop plot to make it happen, like, great...
BTW will you tell me the end please?
"Meow"said the fluffy golden cat.Jack was a nerd and so was his best friend Bob.When Bobs birthday arrived his parents bought him a mint condition chemistry kit.Jack and Bob instantly thought lets get mixing some liquids ,and see what happens.Eventually,they created an glowing iluminous colour.There eyes were stuck to it. They wonderd what would happen if they tried it?Bob had a lightbulb idea and spoke "let's try it on fluffy."
Fluffy was parched,so she licked it until it was finished.Suddenly...Fluffy started to magical shoot up and in just a few seconds she was a beast!She ripped of the roof and pounced to the city.Fluffy purred and the earth shaked.
She suddenly started liking buildings like they were giant chew toys.
A dog walker stared at his dog very ominously.His dog started sneezing and then changed colour.Every time the dog took a step it became hairier.
"What are we going to do!?"cried Jack.
King Cat was destroying everything in its path.She grabbed someone and pounced to the top of the Empire State Building."How ironic,"said Jack.
Out of nowhere Jack shouted a needle"!"What do you mean...a needle"? asked Bob "You'll see,follow me."
They ran like lightning to what was left of their house.After 20 minutes of running they made it to the ruins of the city.They were carrying a needle with a size of 47 feet tall.
Jack and Bob ran to the Empire State Building and strolled to the elevator,they pressed the 60th floor.They were stood there for 2 minutes listening to cheesy music.When they arrived that started to throw ice cubes and water balloons but to defend itself it started throwing hair balls to defend itself.When I give you the signal stab it with the needle.After battling Bob shouted now and Jack jumped in the air and stabbed King cat in the heart.
Then for the rest of the night they celebrated their victory.
Deep in gelid woods, where everything is dead or freezing cold, lies what now is my cave. Who would predict that my life at N.Y. as Director of one of the most popular companies in the world would change. Now I live in this cave at the frozen wasteland at Alaska. Now I am the last survivor of a plane crash. It all started about a week ago… I was to make connection with other companies on our system… It was Tom, Kyle Beesley and me. I already knew the drill we got into the plane to the airport at Montana. We spent 3 days talking about business. Then we head back to N. Y. on the 4th day. But this time it didn’t go that way… The pilot was a rookie who had just gotten his license and he was very distracted as well so we got on the plane when there were only 15 more minutes to get to Montana when suddenly the pilot fainted… We were flying around for who knows how many hours! We screamed like if there was no tomorrow! Kyle got control of the aircraft, but Tom was getting hysterical he repeatedly said that he couldn’t take more of this. I tried to calm him down for just a second but he wouldn’t. He even grew more nervous every minute until… He… threw himself … out of the plane! Kyle and I couldn’t believe it, he just opened the door and said “I won’t take more of this… I can’t … I just can’t take more of this torture” and he went out of the plane. We couldn’t see him fall, the blizzard was too dense.
After Tom’s death I started to notice a red dot blinking even on the plane. Things were still to blur but as I zoomed in I notice that was the gas tank, it was empty, and if the gas tank was empty then we…where falling! As soon as Kyle noticed this he got as nervous as I. We were about to crash on… Who knows where…? We wouldn’t survive I saw all my life pass through my eyes. So we crashed. At that moment I couldn’t see anything. I had a white out, I only kept saying “Anyone there?! Help! Kyle, Kyle are you ok bud! Kyle, Tom, Pilot, Anyone…” The next morning it was very cold but I started to see. I saw Kyle but he was dead anyway I dragged him to a cave I found near the crash site. I also found the pilot but I just left him there, at that moment I was so hopeless that I only want to dispose of the events I just lived. However, inside the cave, I found Kyle’s matches to make fire and some raisins which were enough. Water! I need a way to get water. Well ice is the frozen form of water, so if I heat up water in a container… I quickly remembered the cups in the plane, so I got them. Off difficultly but they were out. I heated up the ice but it wasn’t enough so Y brought more, and more ice filled the cup, it was full. Then, I managed to arrange the snow to make sort of entrance with some Iron rods and other pieces of the plane with snow and ice. I made 3 of these 2 to block the other entrances and one for me to enter. The next day I just searched the plane to see if there was anything that I could use to make a signal but it was al junk, so I returned to the cave when I remembered about my phone, but it was almost useless I couldn’t call but I could use the flashlight and compass that is how I figured that I was at Alaska, and that the nearest city was at 500 km north. I wouldn’t make it to that city, not with this weather. So I ate some raisins and slept. The blizzard was worst than ever I had to recover the walls, as well as the entrance that is when I decided… I would have to get him out of the cave, he was just getting in the middle of things and besides he was already dead to begin with, so I put him outside the cave. The blizzard was too strong I couldn’t sleep! That is when I realized what would happen if I didn’t make it. Friends, family, all lost. I wasn’t going to let that happen, I wouldn’t give up not now, not ever. I Will never give up.
The next morning I was very thirsty, so I got some water from the melted ice, and ate some more raisins. They were almost none now. There still was a very strong blizzard. When I stepped the snow my feet sank, it was too much snow, and one wrong step and I could die! I got to the plane one last time to see what I could find but everything was too damage to use, when suddenly… an avalanche was coming right for me when I entered the cave I decided to eat. The box, it was empty! So I threw it to the fire, and went to sleep… At night the walls fell off and the blizzard entered the cave like a silent assassin. I knew I was going to die.. Well at least I was prepared for the last… When then a thunder sound, but not one of those creepy thunders, it was a different kind of thunder a known thunder…A savior thunder… It was God sending a message…It was a helicopter.
Title: Life at Alaska
“Kids, ready up, we are going to be late,” said Mr. Carlos. Everyone was on the bus ready for the trip. The only one missing was Noah, my best friend. Noah took the seat right next to me. I was so happy because we are exploring the tallest mountain on Utah. We are midway of the trip and I saw how far we are from the ground. The street was very stretch and rocky bumping head to head. Dave, the clown of the class throwed a soft tennis ball to the driver. Rapidly, the driver looked behind at a curve and gave a loud “Ouch! What was that.” But what he doesn’t know is that a big truck was taking the same curve as him. When he gave the sight back to the road he saw the big truck coming right over they are.
Boom! Sounded the crash. Unfortunately, the bus felt off of the road bumping with rocks and crashing with every ice cap on its way. The bus stopped at the end of a strong branch coming out of the mountain. I was stunned but 10 seconds later I was back to normal. Noah? Noah! It seems like he took a shower of blood. Apparently, everyone was down and the driver was unconscious. I made some small steps trying not to step on anyone neither drop the bus by my weight. I looked for the black button the made the main door open. ”Dang it!” I whispered. The button didn’t function. I opened the emergency door and suddenly a massive amount of wind heated my face. “Uzzzzzz,” sounded the wind. I closed the door “Puff! I knew from that moment that I needed to get more clothing so I went back to look for some clothe. I took Noah jacket just to keep him on my memory. I climbed to the top of the bus and so I tried to look for a sliding route so I can get to the ground alive. The snow swallowed my feet and the little snow drops heated my face.
“Ok, is just 20 meters down and it will feel like falling on a pillow, or at least that what I think.” I dive into the snow and I stick all my body to make it easier threw. “That was all, “I landed safe but the problem now is that I am standing on a huge lonely forest. Everything was quiet. I could barely hear a pin drop. To be honest I was scared and shaking. The trees were lifeless. No animals at my surrounding. I walked and walked looking for something to eat but nothing appears. The sky was getting darker and I was getting hungrier and exhausted. I sat next to a wasted tree. Wolfs started to howl to the moon and so I tried to run away from them. I had goose bumps all over my body. I hardly know how to make fire. The only way I knew was the classic way. I never tried it to put a bunch of wood pieces but it worth a try. Vigilantly, I made some quiet steps not to alarm the fearless wolfs. I took the remaining pieces of a left out trunk. I stroke the two pieces of wood but nothing worked!
I am not finished.
In The Middle Of Nowhere
It was cold, the temperature was -15. Our plane crash was 4 days ago. We were supposed to land on Russia but we crashed on Alaska. By we I mean my brother and me we were the only ones to survive the airplane crash.
Our only resources were from the passengers’ suit cases. Luckily it looked like a passenger was going to climb some mountains, so he had a tent, some food, hunting weapons and finally some warm cloth. We were already all set up but the problem was that we didn’t know how to set up a tent. My brother and I were in the middle of nowhere looking like ancient people using a cell phone.
When we finally found the instructions we set it up near the plane just in case the airplane company will send a rescue team. We waited for hours in tent hoping that at least we were going to hear a helicopter. My hope each seconds lowered and lowered.
When the night came it was even colder. The warm cloth wasent working, we needed to make a fire. I thought that if we had a hard time making a simple tent I just dident want to imagine how much I was going to take to make a fire.
I also thought with what wood would I make a fire. My brother and me huged so our body heat will stay normal or at the one we where. Our only source o light was the two flashlights and the big moon at that night.
Slowly I felt to sleep.
Next Morning my brother wakes me up with a happy face. He told me to go outside to see. When I got outside I saw snowmobiles and helicopters they were here to save us. When we got to the helicopter they said that we were lucky, that not that much of people survive crashes like this.
The Wild is Calling
By: Ana Julia Gonzalez
I was so happy to go on a trip to Canada for a week. I was going to be snow boarding all week and I loved it. When my family got on the plane it was huge, but the problem was that we were the only ones there. I got really scared but as soon as my family and my boyfriend came in the plane I forgot about it.
In just minutes we were off to Canada. We where heading to Yukon, located in the northwest part of Canada. Before I knew it, I was asleep. When I woke up we were almost there, but something starts to smell like burned metal and plastic that was making me sick. I stood up to go to the bathroom and when I turn around the plane was up in flames.
I was screaming and started to cry. I think again and think of where is my family when I turn around they were sleeping and hadn't even noticed what was happening. I start to wake them up and they begin to shout and scream like me.
We were just about to hit the floor when I shout for us to jump to the lake that was there, they all agreed and we jumped out.
We were lucky that we were wearing clothe appropriate for this weather because if not we would have frozen to death. When our heads get out of the water we were freezing. We got out of the water and started to make our way to the crashed plane. We were going to look for our bags so that we could get clean and dry clothes from our suitcases.
When we get to the plane it is all burned and it smelled really bad. We make a plan to get going on looking for our suitcases. When we find it we change and we realize at this point what are we going to do know to get out of here. They get out there phones and they are soaking wet. Now they know that there is no way out of here. It starts getting darker by the minute and we realize that we need to find a shelter immediately.
We begin to walk and find a cave. When we walk in we are mesmerized by the view, it is beautiful. We lay down and in minutes all of us are fast asleep. When we wake up we where in a beautiful cave. When they start to stand up my stomach starts to growl. I was very hungry and I wish I was home but I knew we would have to fight for our lives to keep ourselves alive.
We start to walk and we see a wolf. We were so scared that the wolf will harm us that we started to run. When I turn around I hear a scream and I see that my father was being eaten by a wolf. We all start to scream and I realize we can’t do anything or we will die too. So I tell everyone to keep running but my mother does not listen, so me, my brother, and my boyfriend start to run and when I turn around my mother was also being eaten. We start to cry so hard that we could have flooded a whole village. I was so sad but maybe there was still a chance for me to return home alive…
The call of the wild
We were there the three of us, one of them was freezing and we had to sacrifice him, let him out of his misery. As we buried him we cried. We then saw this wolf, but what amused me was that the gray wolf with his heavy thin fur was alone, I questioned that for some time, maybe he stayed behind the others.
The blizzard took everything, it was devastating. I was scared and I didn't know what to do, but then out of a sudden he leads me to a sort of dog sled there were 11 dogs tied and one empty slot he managed to get out. At the end of the sled I saw food, wood, and more thing we were happy to see that.
I walked towards the opposite side of the sled and I could see frosted body parts spreaded throughout the snow; dispersed
and also an iron chromed hatchet. I was surprised it was intact even after the horrible blizzard that took place yesterday we went to the woods hoping to find some food, we were starving. I hadn't drinked my pills I was freaking out, my cousin needed his phone, he was truly desperate I needed something to do apart of becoming a human Popsicle.
Out of a sudden the wolf came back running it was a bear following us, I had never been to Canada before in my entire life. I didn't recognize that place as if it was Romana or Casa de Campo. I was about to collapse but my cousin grabbed me before I felt backwards, when I woked up I was on the sled with my cousin's clothes on he was there freezing beside me naked on the cold snow.
The bear came again and the dogs went running with me on the sled, that 400 pound monster started eating my cousin, now I was really alone. Alone, there was nothing I could do but follow my destiny and what it hold for me.
I could taste the salt in my mouth. Drop, drop, drop. Everything was quiet except for my tears. They kept falling down like rain from the skies. Boom, boom, boom, the cats stomped. "Dawn of The Cats!" people kept screaming. Everybody ran , and I was under my bed. I have to get out! I start moving slowly, step by step I get closer to the window. I poke 1 eye outside, and all I saw was people running and the giant fluffy cats. They look like giant clouds, because of their white fur.
As I walked out of my apartment I saw people heading to a roof, so I quickly decided to follow them. I finally reached the top and now I saw a cat starring right at my soul. I was terrified, frozen, I was paralyzed. I shouted, "what do you want?" The cat responded "Meow".
Talking to a cat didn't work, so I started to think about other ways I could defeat the cats. I had an amazing idea, a dog squad. Yes a giant dog squad. I hustled to the police station, there I saw a K9 unit of dogs, and I started to imagine the dogs beating the cats... As I walked to the center of town with the dogs some squirles passed by, and, well, you know what happened next... That was it ,"This is the end," everybody shouted. Nothing could defeat the cats except the mighty force of God. He couldn't take it, so he decended from the sky, and for the first time the cats were scared. Can you guess what a cat's worst fear is...water. God took all of the earth's water and poured it over the cats. At last everything was over, and the next day everything went back to normal.
7B is one of Ms. Nina's 7th grade classes! Check back here to see what we're working on.